hidden words of love

sinsitykitty


JUSTA GIRL WITH A CAMERA

WHO AM I? NOT SURE YET BUT IT HAS BEEN FUN FINDING OUT


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sinsitykitty
Yesterday sucked!!  Steven started taking a new kind of pain medication on Monday night.  Tueday afternoon he started feeling some side effects.  First the dizziness...then the tingling/numbness....then chest pains.  His supervisor took him to the er to make sure that he wasn't having a heart attck.  (I should mention that this all happened around noon)  At 3:00 the supervisior give me a call because he THOUGHT I would like to know that my husband is in the hospital with chest pains. NICE...REAL NICE!

The part that bugs me the most....I wasn't there when the accident happened....and if things had been worse...I WASN'T THERE.  I know that I would have never gotten over that.  Since the accident, there have been three incidents where he has had to be taken to the ER for complications/pain.  Everytime his supervisior waits three or fours hours to call me (in other words, when its convienent for him to call)

But what happens that ONE time, when the pain/complications are extremely serious and Steven doesn't make it?  A call 4 hours later does me no good....and once again I WOULD'T be there for him.  I have this fear...a fear I can't even begin to describe....its paralyzing this fear of mine....that for whatever reason...I won't be there when he really needs me.  

I love him so much and it hurts so badly that I can't make him better.  And yesterday didn't help the matter any.

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ack...I"m sorry, *hugs*-- that's ridiculous he waits so long...I mean, even in my c-section I kept asking where my husband was, and they told me he'd be right in, etc.-- Maybe steven should ask his supervisor to call immedietly, do you think that'd help? :/

well after this last time...I told him yesterday that as soon as he gets a chance, he needs to call me and let me know. I told him that these last two years have been really hard and that I NEED to be with him when he's hurt. He says that he'll call first but we will see

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