October 7th, 2017

hidden words of love

It's been so long...

Dear lord it has been a long time since I have been on LJ. I'm not really sure I am anywhere close to the same person that I was when I started this account. So much has happened to me, to my family...I'm not really sure where to start.

We have moved several times in the past ten years. Mostly to different places in Montana and have finally found a place that I want to call home. I found a community and a sense of my self that I didn't know I was missing. It didn't come over night but slowly over the first year of being here I started to appear.

I used to think that I was supposed to be the follower...follow my husband's career...follow the flow of whatever was happening without wondering about wanting change.  In all honesty I probably would still be that way if life had not forced us to change, to adapt, to make the best of a shitty situation.

By the time we got here Steven had been promoted several times and was given his own store to run as a general manager. Life was good. He was working, I was being the dutiful stay at home mom & caregiver, and Caleb was growing up into a smart, handsome and caring man. I say life was good and it was but like most things...when you look closer it has its faults and rotten spots.

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